The teenage years can be challenging – no doubt about that. How to help your teenager get organized for school, college or university requires asking questions and considering what works for them, what doesn’t work, when their high energy cycles are and understanding how they work best. For some teens dealing with all the change that are being thrown at them can be difficult, and if they don’t have the skills needed to keep things organized, they can get overwhelmed pretty quickly. If you’re a parent and looking to help your older child navigate the chaotic world, here are a few things that you can do.
It is important to remember that the teenage years is a time of discovery, self-growth and realization. In other words, your teen will push you away and will most likely refuse any help that you offer. It’s the nature of the beast. Just like you did, they are trying to figure out who they are, and what their place is in the world.
Be An Example for Getting Organized
Instead of telling them how to organize their busy schedule, as a parent you need to set an example and some basic boundaries. Make sure they know what is expected of them, and the consequences of their actions. Then take a step back and allow them to get things done in their own way. One example is to give your child a list of chores that need to be done by a certain day each week. Let him or her know that if the chores are not done in a timely manner, than something they enjoy will become temporarily unavailable – such as a particular video game, or access to the internet. Then take the difficult step of stepping back and allowing them to organize their time and efforts as they see fit. Could it end disastrously? Yes. Could things go undone? Of course they could. The important thing is to allow your teen to face the consequences of their action or lack thereof.
Create a Schedule
Of course, your teen is still watching you and seeing what you do even while they are pushing you away. Therefore it’s important to set a good example. Make a schedule, make it known, and keep to your deadlines. If you miss one – make sure there are consequences to your actions, one that your teenager can see and understand. For example, if one of your projects was to cut the grass by Friday and Sunday rolls around and the grass is still waist high, tell your teen to take your golf clubs. There will be no golfing for you until the grass it cut.
Every so often, your teen may ask for help, or accept an offer for help. Once you’ve gotten over your fainting spell, make sure you approach the situation practically and without blame. Again, give suggestions – things such as having a specific place on their desk for homework, or scheduling an hour each day for piano practice. The important thing here is to allow them to create their own techniques, to let them find what works best for them.
